Over the years I have found with some clients that they don’t appear to be experiencing anything very much in the sessions, but their lives start shifting incredibly fast. So they keep coming back, sometimes a bit bemused because "nothing’s happening" but it is all happening in their lives. They are somehow manifesting a new life. It’s fascinating that it happens that way for some people whilst others seem to need emotional outpourings or fireworks and drama. It seems to me that we experience just what we need to experience.
Recently a little thing happened to a friend of mine. She is a mother with a late addition to the family. The other children are grown up and she’s got a young one. She came round for coffee, very confused, absolutely exhausted, doing too much, needing to cut things out. She was booked to do a course on art therapy for children the following weekend. "I just don’t know what to do," she said. I said, "How about a breathe?" She had a free hour so she breathed for that hour. It was very calm. I could see from her breathing that she’d really dropped deeply into herself and she was off somewhere. She came back, sat up and she looked absolutely gorgeous. "Ah," she said, "it’s wondrous. I feel totally calm. I’ve never felt so relaxed. I heard a voice telling me - Suffer the little children to come unto you." She went off to the course that weekend knowing that wasn’t one of the things she needed to give up. Sometimes just one session is what’s needed, in the moment. She just needed to get in touch with her real self, temporarily. It was a lovely feeling to be able to support that.
Sometimes I am asked when a new client comes for a consultation: after 20 years, how has rebirthing changed your life? It’s quite a difficult question to answer because the changes over time are so radical. How do you express them all? An answer that I have come up with, that feels close to expressing something fundamental that has changed is this: I feel as though I walk on different ground. I feel that the ground I walk on is different from the ground I walked on 20 years ago. The ground I walked on before was not very solid, not very stable - it was forever shifting, reality itself didn’t seem stable. Now I walk on solid ground. I experience myself as different: I can go through the same kinds of dramas, the same attitudes, the same anything, but I have a different perspective: a defined sense of self and of reality.